LADOT mingles with cyclists at an April event at the Autry Center (LADOT/Twitter)

While the Redditor was verified as a real LADOT employee, the conversation was not sanctioned by LADOT, hence the answers are not necessarily official. 

So here's what you need to know...

Sometimes jerks paint the curbs red or blue or even rainbow.

"I get a few requests every week asking me to investigate whether or not a curb is legal… If you or someone you know received a ticket for parking in an illegally installed red curb zone, dispute it. Unfortunately, parking enforcement officers may not always know what's legal and what's not because things are always changing. However, we will investigate the request, and if the curb was illegally painted, your ticket will be dismissed."

Yellow curbs, however, might be your new best friend. 

"Yellow loading zones are enforced 7 AM to 6 PM, except on Sundays. White loading zones are always enforced." 

Translation: You can park in yellow loading zones from 6 PM-7 AM.

Cyclists, however, have more enemies than they could ever wish for. 

"Most of the time, people are against bike lanes because they will almost certainly eat up an entire lane of vehicular traffic. You might argue that they need not take up the whole lane, but the department tends to add a buffer between the bike lane and vehicular traffic to enhance safety. Further, adding bike lanes usually narrows a pre-existing lane too much."

You can actually make changes to the street parking by your house.

"For residential roads, we have official petitions you can file to modify parking restrictions on your road. If the requests are reasonable and we don't have a compelling reason to keep the restriction in place, you can be successful."

But parking restrictions aren't always such a bad thing.  

"LAPD might notice suspicious behavior in certain areas and ask that we install parking restrictions to help reduce crime."

Plus even if a space were available, you couldn't keep your car there all week. 

"Vehicles must be moved every 72 hours or they are subject to citation and/or towing."

It's not all in your head, super long red lights are real.

"We do change the behavior of red lights during off-peak/nighttime hours."

And they are controlled from a secret office in City Hall.

"All signals within the City are coordinated to work together and ensure more greens. This program has been an ongoing effort since 1984 and was completed last year. We can also now remotely control signals for busy events at our City Hall headquarters."

But seriously, don't hate on LADOT; they aren't the ones giving you jaywalking tickets. 

"Beyond parking enforcement, LADOT can't do much in the way of enforcement. We can only post signs, mark roadways, etc. and hope that drivers behave. However, ensuring that people actually follow the law falls under LAPD's jurisdiction."

Contact Deputy Editor Sara Newman here. Follow her on Twitter here.