Microsoft announced it will be laying off 18,000 employees over the new few months—unfortunate for all involved. That's more job cuts than Microsoft has ever had to make, and clearly, that's very bad news for a lot of employees.

Which is why it's pretty lame that when Microsoft exec Stephen Elop delivered the blow in a letter, he buried the lead. Like, by a lot.

New York Magazine published the memo, adding some colorful commentary throughout the 14-paragraph message. How long did it take for Stephen Elop to officially tell employees they were getting the ax? Exactly 11 long paragraphs.

Some highlights from the first 10 paragraphs include the following:

"Microsoft’s strategy is focused on productivity and our desire to help people 'do more.'” 

"While our direction in the majority of our teams is largely unchanging, we have had an opportunity to plan carefully about the alignment of phones within Microsoft as the transferring Nokia team continues with its integration process."

"We plan to right-size our manufacturing operations to align to the new strategy and take advantage of integration opportunities."

Boring, infuriating and gag-worthy for all to whom the letter is addresssed.

Check out New York Magazine's brilliant take-down of a really long-winded way of saying, "You're fired."

Reach Executive Producer Cassie Paton here. Follow her on Twitter here.