In today’s edition of “Thoroughly Unshocking News,” Stan Van Gundy has been fired as coach of the Orlando Magic.

The team also announced that it and general manager Otis Smith mutually agreed to part ways. But the story lies in Van Gundy’s departure. Franchise cornerstone and legendarily indecisive center Dwight Howard won. It was no surprise that the franchise chose Team Dwight over Team Stan -- a coach affects the game so much from the bench whereas Howard in his peak swings games and even playoff series (although Van Gundy coached the hell out of a Howard-less team after Howard’s back acted up).

One had to go after Van Gundy put his arm around Howard and pushed him under the bus in the “Diet Pepsi Presser Heard ‘round the World” (see below). It induced a similar level of awkwardness almost as many cringes as (semi-dated reference alert) Michael Scott and Jan’s dinner party in “The Office.”

(Note: Before delving into the Van Gundy side, Smith was smart to leave. He played Howard-ball perfectly last February, refusing to budge and allowing Howard to blink, signing his player option. He has made some questionable moves, but that was perfect.)

The Magic followed the established code of “Stars over Coaches” popularly brought to basketball by Magic Johnson and his feud with Paul Westhead in the early 80s. Unlike Howard, Johnson explicitly went public with the contempt of his coach. Howard’s distaste of Van Gundy did turn public as seen in the presser. But Howard denied it and acted childish.

(Another note: Wilt Chamberlain was actually dealt from multiple teams because he did not peacefully coexist with coaches. The exception, not the rule.)

That has all been retread and covered. It’s clear in that video. The problem now presented is a question: Who will want to come in and deal with Dwight Howard and his personality problem?

Perhaps that’s too dramatic. Having the best center in the league on your team is an asset that teams desire, character concerns aside. When healthy, he is a monster.

Names such as Brian Shaw and Mike Malone have been circulating. Both are assistant coaches, with Shaw’s name held in high, public regard. Surely, both men want to cut their teeth as a head coach. But would Orlando really be the prime spot to do so?

It’s a volatile situation. Howard only signed on for the 2012-13 season, uncommitted to spending more than another season with the Magic. The whole team is structured around Howard’s extraordinary defense and is the “in” -- post presence -- to the team’s “in-and-out” offense.

The Magic front office states that Howard did not ask for Van Gundy to be fired. So now, the departed coach is vilified and called a liar. What reason did Van Gundy have to lie? Even if he did, the organization’s integrity is now at risk. From the outside, it looks like a complete mess, utter chaos. The Magic bow down and serve Howard, who may very well be hanging with Jay-Z in two years, leaving a fractured team in his wake.

Basketball is a sport in which the coach can only go as far as the talent can take them. This is true in most sports but maybe truer on the hardwood. Could Peyton Manning have won a Super Bowl without Tony Dungy? Maybe. Arguably unlikely. Would Michael Jordan have won any titles without Phil Jackson? Probably. But Jackson reined in Jordan and managed the team. He wasn’t a Vince Lombardi type. But he won six titles with Jordan, three with Shaquille O’Neal and Kobe Bryant and another two with Bryant and company. He handled all of their giant personalities and relatively minimized them.

Back to Stan Van. Even as Magic CEO Alex Martins alluded to in his press conference today, describing Van Gundy and Howard’s relationship other than contemptuous would be a joke. Martins additionally stated that the Magic want to pick up a coach who is more player friendly, admitting that finding a tactic-savvy coach such as Van Gundy would be nearly impossible.

Howard may be happier with a coach that will put his arm around him to be buddy-buddy with. But that coach will need to be tough on him and must be knowledgeable. But what difference does the coach make if Howard decides to chill with Jay-Z after next season?

Sports Illustrated recently ran a feature on Tim Duncan that preached the theme “Star players allow themselves to be coached.” So far, Howard has succumbed in some ways but clearly not in others.

Smarten up, Dwight (NSFW). Mature. Ultimately, it will not matter if you leave Orlando or stay, Dwight. The public is exhausted. It wants you to reach your full potential and not kill coaches. The public wants you to be great. You’re not an asshole, Dwight. You’re just trying so hard to be.

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