Marble walls aren't the typical jail cell decor. (David Alagem)

It's nighttime.  She wraps her cold, pale fingers around the metal bars that seal the miniscule window; the metal that separates her from the rest of the world.  She stares up at the sliver of sky that is barely visible between the bars and thinks about what she has done to get here.  She thinks about the wrongdoings that have brought her here, to this dingy six by eight jail cell.  Her eyes pool with tears as the reality of where she will be spending the next few months of her young life takes hold.  Fat, hot tears escape from her big blue eyes and mark a trail down her sallow cheeks; she brushes them away with the sleeve of her fur jacket...

Wait, fur jacket?  Something doesn't quite add up.

The Beverly Hills Police Department recently launched a new program called "Pay to Stay at the Beverly Hills Jail," where you can apply to stay in a nicer, more flexible jail - if  you are willing to pay $110 a day.  The program is set up like a hybrid of applying to college and requesting an upgrade at a hotel: When someone is arrested for a non-violent crime, in any county or even any state, he can ask the judge to complete the jail sentence in a "Pay to Stay" program.  However, there are strict "booking and housing requirements," according to Jail Supervisor Randy Neitzke.  "A sentenced individual will not be accepted into the 'Pay to Stay' program if he or she has a history of violence, is a sex, drug or arson registrant or has a situation or condition that may endanger the health, safety or welfare of the other 'Pay to Stay' inmates or the Jail staff."  

Most of the people so far who have participated in the "Pay to Stay" program in Beverly Hills have been charged with DUIs, forgery or grand theft.  "You get a lot of those people who go to Saks Fifth Avenue, see something they like for a thousand dollars or so, and walk out of the store with it without bothering to pay," says Neitzke.  Those who want to complete their sentence in the program have to fill out an extremely long and detailed application (yes, just like applying to college), and once they are cleared and accepted they can begin serving time in one of the swankiest jails in the country.  

What makes this program different from other jail programs?  The many perks, of course.  "Customers," as Neitzke calls them, of the "Pay to Stay" program don't have to do much in terms of chores or work while they are serving their time.  "For the most part, they are sitting here, kicking back and watching TV and doing whatever they want."  The jail has two common rooms, one for men and one for women, which are both fully equipped with large screen televisions and telephones.  The "customers" have free reign over the telephone (they can talk on the phone all day, if they choose), and they can change the channels on the television whenever they want.  Of course, however, there are some rules to keep these misfits in their place: They are not allowed to bring in any electronic device that can transmit information.  So, no cell phones, no blackberriesand no laptops.  What they can bring with them, though (and for the type of clientele that seems to be frequenting the program, these items may be more important than electronics) are clothing, comforts from home, such as pillows and bedding, and food.  Imagine, if you will, how this plays out: A woman (like the one I mentioned above) wearing pressed jeans and a fur jacket, throat adorned with jewels,  is perched on a bed (or concrete bunk) swathed with 1,000 thread count Pratesi sheets.  Her slipper-clad feet are propped up on the metal toilet (the cell is rather tiny, and unfortunately there is no ottoman), and she is flicking through the new issue of Vogue magazine before bed.  (It even sounds like the setting for a Vogue fashion spread, doesn't it?)      
 
Jail Supervisor Randy Neitzke brought this program to Beverly Hills for a simple reason. "It is an amazing source of funding.  All of the revenue goes directly to the general fund of the city, which is one of the main reasons I started the program here," he says.  (In Los Angeles alone, there are ten or 12 other jails that have "Pay to Stay" programs.)
 
"The upper clientele ... are looking to these programs because they don't want to go through the basic LA county jail system," Neitzke says. "I was a deputy Sheriff for 10 years and I've seen the conditions with rats running across your toes, big spiders that don't have names yet, and not to mention the clientele that are in those county jails.  This will make the choice of a Pay to Stay jail program the best choice ever."  If it sounds like this statement should be put on a promotional flyer advertising the jail, you are not far off.  The program plans on doing a big PR push to advertise and get new customers.  Flyers and applications will be handed out in public spaces, such as outside bars, college campuses and courthouses, so criminals know of the more luxurious option they have if convicted of a non-violent crime.  

"Pay to Stay" clients also have options when it comes to how they want to complete their sentence.  There are three different programs people can participate in to complete their time at the Beverly Hills Jail: straight time, weekenders and the work furlough program. Straight time is just how it sounds - you do your time straight, with no comings and goings. The "weekender" program works like this: if you are a young student or you just got a new job, and the judge says you need to do 30 days before a certain date, you have a choice to come in only on weekends. Check in is Saturday morning at 8 AM and check out is Monday morning This counts as two full days, and the "customer" comes in every weekend until she completes the sentence. The "work furlough program" is for people who work and have a professional career. The "customers" can go to work in the morning for 8 hours, and then have to be back at the jail for the night, like a curfew. The time that they spend at work and spend at the jail during that one day is considered by the judge to be a 24-hour period of time. Not bad, huh?

There are two sides to the Beverly Hills "Pay to Stay" jail, one for women and one for men. Each have a common room with a couch in front of the television, and a large table and chairs off to the side. Each side has seven cells (with a toilet in each) and one shower. The kitchen, which is so nice that it is shared between inmates and jail employees, boasts a huge refrigerator and freezer, coffee maker, microwave, and pretty much anything you could ever need. Patrons of the "Pay to Stay" program can bring in their own pre-packaged food, and heat it up in the microwave or oven at their own convenience.  Craving a midnight snack while you are doing time for getting a DUI?  Don't worry, just head on down to the kitchen in your jammies for some milk and cookies.  

With such amazing accommodations and perks, this jail is bound to be the newest celebrity hot spot, and in fact it is. Celebrity DUIs have become all the rage recently, and it is no wonder the rich and famous prefer the "Pay to Stay" program in Beverly Hills above all other options. "We had Lindsay Lohan in here before for a short stint," says Neitzke.  "The kind of attention we get from our celebrity clientele has already attracted so many people who want to stay here.  We are anticipating a very long wait list in the coming months."  

So, if, god forbid, you wind up getting pulled over after having a few cocktails or you can't control your sticky fingers next time you're in Barneys, don't panic. You can now replace the images of rodents and mystery meat with Pratesi sheets and big-screen televisions, and join the ranks of celebrity jail-rats Lindsey and Paris. But you better put yourself on the waiting list soon, because according to Neitzke, "This place is going to fill up, and fill up fast."